Thursday, May 25, 2006

The 'Y' Party

About 6 p.m. Thursday, I called Lynn and suggested that perhaps there might yet be hope for the Republican Party.

Maybe, I suggested, Rove had come up with a clever scheme: Fake support for an amnesty bill (which was paid for in advance by rich liberal Republicans last July*), to lull the Democrats into overconfidence and then, in a surprise move after Labor Day, double-cross the big money boys, kill the bipartisan McCain-Kennedy Destroy America Act of 2006, push through a Tancredo-Sessions enforcement-only bill and ...

"You're crazy," Lynn said.

So I went inside and checked again. The hallucination was still there, in the form of an Associated Press list that showed 23 Republican senators with "Y" beside their names. Yes, I must be delusional: There isn't a "Y" Party ... is there?

According to my hallucination, the "Y" Party had 23 members in the Senate:

Alexander (Y-Tennessee)
Bennett (Y-Utah)
Brownback (Y-Kansas)
Chafee (Y-Rhode Island)
Cochran (Y-Mississippi)
Coleman (Y-Minnesota)
Collins (Y-Maine)
Cornyn (Y-Texas)
Craig (Y-Idaho)
DeWine (Y-Ohio)
Domenici (Y-Mexico)
Frist (Y-Tennessee)
Graham (Y-South Carolina)
Gregg (Y-New Hampshire)
Hagel (Y-Nebraska)
Hatch (Y-Utah)
Hutchison (Y-Texas)
Kyl (Y-Arizona)
Lott (Y-Mississippi)
Lugar (Y-Indiana)
Martinez (Y-Florida)
McCain (Y-Arizona)
McConnell (Y-Kentucky)
Murkowski, (Y-Alaska)
Smith, (Y-Oregon)
Snowe, (Y-Maine)
Specter (Y-Pennsylvania)
Stevens (Y-Alaska)
Thomas (Y-Wyoming)
Voinovich (Y-Ohio)
Warner (Y-Virginia)

Obviously, I've lost my mind, because no Republican would actually ever have a "Y" beside his name. No Republican would vote to betray the voters who elected him, do the bidding of the most notorious leaders of the opposition party, forfeit American sovereignty, and subvert the rule of law.

No, no -- I'm nuts. Stark raving bonkers. This could never happen, not in a million years. The hallucination continued, however, and I had this vision of sending an e-mail to a Republican:
I was at the Bradley Symposium today.

Then I came back to work and learned that 23 Republican Senators voted to approve the McCain-Kennedy Destroy America Act of 2006.

I suppose I am most angry at my own folly, for having ever dared to hope. Why, please tell me, did my daughter and I stand in the cold rain on Constitution Avenue for Inauguration Day 2001?

But here's the ironic thing: Bush was the first Republican presidential candidate I'd ever voted for.

I see now that, if I had wanted to be misgoverned by arrogant bastards who hate America, I should have stuck with the Democrats, who are more or less honest about it.
The hallucinatory state seems to have subsided. But I'm still afraid to look to see if the Senate actually did anything Thursday. I mean, what if It were true?


* Peter Wallsten and Nicole Gaouette,
"Immigration Rising on Bush's To-Do List," Los Angeles Times, July 24, 2005. The article described the administration's plan to "marginalize hard-liners," among other things. In an interesting development, on the same day the Senate bill passed, the Wallsten-Gaouette article has been deleted from the L.A. Times Web site, and the only Internet site which quoted extensively from the article, the blog, is "experiencing technical difficulties." I suddenly feel like Winston Smith ...